100 Funniest Quotes About Christmas Full Of Joy And Love

100 Funniest Quotes About Christmas Full Of Joy And Love

Funniest Quotes About Christmas – Christmas is usually celebrated as a form of joy and we are familiar with celebrating Christian holidays.

Many moments, experiences, and stories about Christmas, such as, family gatherings, doing other Christmas traditions related to Christmas.

And, don’t forget to enjoy a long holiday accompanied by the new year around the world.

For that, this time in the joy of a holy Christmas, we share 100 funniest quotes about Christmas that are interesting, funny, and entertain everyone in a bright and loving Christmas atmosphere.

Here are the 100 funniest quotes about Christmas that are entertaining in a beautiful atmosphere full of love and depicts a Christmas full of love in the community and family.

Read also: 50 Home Alone Quotes That Bring Us to Christmas Moment

Funniest Quotes About Christmas Full Of Joy And Love

100 Funniest Quotes About Christmas Full Of Joy And Love

1. “Christmas is a time when everybody wants his past forgotten and his present remembered.” – Phyllis Diller

2. “One of the most glorious messes in the world is the mess created in the living room on Christmas day. Don’t clean it up too quickly.” – Andy Rooney

3. “Never worry about the size of your Christmas tree. In the eyes of children, they are all 30 feet tall.” – Larry Wilde

4. “Let’s be naughty and save Santa the trip.” – Gary Allan

5. “Once again, we come to the Holiday Season, a deeply religious time that each of us observes in his own way, by going to the mall of his choice.” – Dave Barry

6. “Some people are born for Halloween, and some are just counting the days until Christmas.” – Stephen Graham Jones

7. “Christmas Eve, a perfect night to express affection for your family, to forgive those who failed you, and to forget past mistakes.” – Unknown

8. “The best of all gifts around any Christmas tree: the presence of a happy family all wrapped up in each other.” – Burton Hillis

9. “Santa Claus has the right idea – visit people only once a year.” – Victor Borge

10. “Nothing’s as mean as giving a little child something useful for Christmas.” – Kin Hubbard

11. “Do give books – religious or otherwise – for Christmas. They’re never fattening, seldom sinful, and permanently personal.” – Lenore Hershey

12. “A lovely thing about Christmas is that it’s compulsory, like a thunderstorm, and we all go through it together.” – Garrison Keillor

13. “I’m dreaming of a white Christmas. But if the white runs out I’ll drink the red.” – Anonymous

14. “Three Wise WOMEN would have asked directions, arrived on time, helped deliver the baby, bought practical gifts, cleaned the stable, made a casserole, and there would be peace on earth!” – Anonymous

15. “From home to home, and heart to heart, from one place to another. The warmth and joy of Christmas, brings us closer to each other.” – Emily Matthews

16. “Probably the reason we all go so haywire at Christmas time with the endless unrestrained and often silly buying of gifts is that we don’t quite know how to put our love into words.” – Harlan Miller

17. “You better watch out, You better not cry, Better not pout, I’m telling you why, Santa Claus is coming to town.” – Haven Gillespie

18. “Dear Santa, Before I explain, how much do you know already?” – Anon

19. “There are three stages of man: he believes in Santa Claus; he does not believe in Santa Claus; he is Santa Claus.” – Bob Phillips

20. “It’s all fun and games until Santa checks the naughty list.” – Anon

100 Funniest Quotes About Christmas Full Of Joy And Love

21. “You know you’re getting old when Santa starts looking younger.” – Robert Paul

22. “I hope Santa leaves me a skinny body and a fat wallet, not the other way around like it was last year.” – Unknown

23. “Let’s be naughty and save Santa the trip.” – Gary Allan

24. “Santa Claus has the right idea – visit people only once a year.” – Victor Borge

25. “A selection of beautiful Christian and religious Christmas quotes that refer to the true meaning of Christmas. Perfect for relatives and friends who believe that Jesus is the reason for the Christmas season!

26. “Good news from heaven the angels bring, Glad tidings to the earth they sing: To us this day a child is given, To crown us with the joy of heaven.” – Martin Luther

27. ‘Bless us Lord, this Christmas, with quietness of mind; Teach us to be patient and always to be kind.” – Helen Steiner Rice

28. “I heard the bells on Christmas Day. There old familiar carols play. And wild and sweet, the words repeat, Of peace on earth, good-will to men.” – Henry Wadsworth Longfellow

29. “May Peace be your gift at Christmas and your blessing all year through!” – Anon

30. “For it is in giving that we receive.” – Francis of Assisi

31. “When we were children we were grateful to those who filled our stockings at Christmas time. Why are we not grateful to God for filling our stockings with legs?” – G.K. Chesterton

32. “People really act weird at Christmas time! What other time of year do you sit in front of a dead tree in the living room and eat nuts and sweets out of your socks?” – Unknown

33. “More than Santa Claus, your sister knows when you’ve been bad and good.” – Linda Sunshine

34. “You can just hear Santa saying ‘Ho, Ho, Ho’ when you receive your credit card statement in January.” – Kate Summers

35. “I never get to see Santa Claus come down the chimney because I always get too tired and fall asleep from eating all his cookies while waiting for him.” – Theodore W. Higginsworth

36. “Santa’s reindeer get around so fast because they have athletes feet.” – Kids Sure Are Funny

37. “Once again, we come to the holiday season, a deeply religious time that each of us observes, in his own way, by going to the mall of his choice.” – Dave Barry

38. “I once bought my kids a set of batteries for Christmas with a note on it saying, ‘Toys not included.” – Bernard Manning

39. “Don’t get your tinsel in a tangle.” – Unknown

40. “A lovely thing about Christmas is that it’s compulsory, like a thunderstorm, and we all go through it together.” – Garrison Keillor

100 Funniest Quotes About Christmas Full Of Joy And Love

41. “Once you stop believing in Santa, you get underwear for Christmas.” – Unknown

42. “You know what I got for Christmas? Fat.” – Unknown

43. “I’m dreaming of a white Christmas. But if the white runs out, I’ll drink the red.” – Unknown

44. “Dear Santa, before I explain, how much do you know already?” – Unknown

45. “The main reason Santa is so jolly is because he knows where all the bad girls live.” – George Carlin

46. “Why is Christmas just like a day at the office? You do all the work and the fat guy with the suit gets all the credit.” – Unknown

47. “It’s all fun and games until Santa checks the naughty list.” – Unknown

48. “Christmas: the only time of year you can sit in front of a dead tree eating candy out of socks.” – Anonymous

49. “At Christmas, all roads lead home.” – Marjorie Holmes

50. “Christmas is a time when you get homesick – even when you’re home.” – Carol Nelson

51. “The best way to spread Christmas cheer is singing loud for all to hear.” – Will Ferrell, “Elf”

52. “May you never be too grown up to search the skies on Christmas eve.” – Anonymous

53. “Maybe Christmas, he thought, doesn’t come from the store. Maybe Christmas… perhaps… means a little bit more!” – The Grinch, by Dr Seuss

54. “It’s not what’s under the Christmas tree that matters, it’s who is around it.” – Anonymous

55. “Christmas Prayer: Guardian angel pure and bright, please lead Santa here tonight.” – Unknown

56. “Christmas is like candy; it slowly melts in your mouth sweetening every taste bud, making you wish it could last forever.” – Richelle Goodrich

57. “I’m only a morning person on December 25th.” – Unknown

58. “Christmas is always a problem to the man who has to convince his kids that there is a Santa Claus, and his wife that there isn’t.” – Evan Esar

59. “At Christmas, tea is compulsory. Relatives are optional.” – Robert Godden

60. “The older I get, the fewer useless gifts I get. The fewer I get, the less I have to wrap to re-gift for next Christmas.” – Robert Rivers

 Full Of Joy And Love

61. “Christmas is a time when you get homesick – even when you’re home.” – Carol Nelson

62. “Christmas is a season not only of rejoicing but of reflection.” – Winston Churchill

63. “Christmas is the season for kindling the fire of hospitality in the hall, the genial flame of charity in the heart.” – Washington Irving

64. “This time of year means being kind to everyone we meet, To share a smile with strangers we may pass along the street.” – Betty Black

65. “May the Christmas season fill your home with joy, your heart with love, and your life with laughter.” – Anon

66. “The light in a child’s eyes is all it takes to make Christmas a magical time of the year.” – Unknown

67. “Christmas is not a time or a season but a state of mind. To cherish peace and good will, to be plenteous in mercy, is to have the real spirit of Christmas.” – Calvin Coolidge

68. “Blessed is the season which engages the whole world in a conspiracy of love.” – Hamilton Write Mabie

69. ”Sending Christmas cards is a good way to let your friends and family know that you think they’re worth the price of a stamp.” – Melanie White

70. ”The office Christmas party is a great opportunity to catch up with people you haven’t seen for 20 minutes.” – Julius Sharpe

71. “What I like about Christmas is that you can make people forget the past with the present.” – Don Marquis

72. “Next to a circus there ain’t nothing that packs up and tears out faster than the Christmas spirit.” – Frank McKinney Hubbard

73. “Never worry about the size of your Christmas tree. In the eyes of children, they are all 30 feet tall.” – Larry Wilde

74. “That’s the true spirit of Christmas; people being helped by people other than me.” – Jerry Seinfeld

75. ”The best way to spread Christmas cheer is singing loud for all to hear.” – Elf

76. ”Christmas is a race to see which gives out first your money or your feet.” – Unknown

77. “Christmas sweaters are only acceptable as a cry for help.” – Andy Borowitz

78. “Christmas is the season when you buy this year’s gifts with next year’s money.” – Unknown

79. ”We celebrate the birth of one who told us to give everything to the poor by giving each other motorized tie racks.” – Bill McKibben

80. “It’s easier to feel a little more spiritual with a couple of bucks in your pocket.” – Craig Ferguson

 Full Of Joy And Love

81. “I love Christmas. I receive a lot of wonderful presents I can’t wait to exchange.” – Henny Youngman

82.“I was Christmas shopping and ran into a guy on the street. I noticed his watch and said that it runs slow. He said, ‘So does the guy I stole it from.’” – David Letterman

83. ”Christmas: It’s the only religious holiday that’s also a federal holiday. That way, Christians can go to their services, and everyone else can sit at home and reflect on the true meaning of the separation of church and state.” – Samantha Bee

84. ”It’s always consoling to know that today’s Christmas gifts are tomorrow’s garage sales.” – Milton Berle

85. “Christmas is a box of tree ornaments that have become part of the family.” – Charles M. Schulz

86. ”Let’s be naughty and save Santa the trip.” – Gary Allan

87. ”I’ve learned that you can tell a lot about a person by the way he handles these three things: a rainy day, lost luggage, and tangled Christmas tree lights.” – Maya Angelou

88. ”The worst gift is a fruitcake. There is only one fruitcake in the entire world, and people keep sending it to each other.” – Johnny Carson

89. “It’s not what’s under the Christmas tree that matters, it’s who is around it.” – Anonymous

90. “Freshly cut Christmas trees smelling of stars and snow and pine resin – inhale deeply and fill your soul with wintry night.” – John Geddes

91. “The Christmas tree is a symbol of love, not money. There’s a kind of glory to them when they’re all lit up that exceeds anything all the money in the world could buy.” – Andy Rooney

92. “Some Christmas tree ornaments do more than glitter and glow, they represent a gift of love given a long time ago.” – Tom Baker

93. “The best of all gifts around any Christmas tree: the presence of a happy family all wrapped up in each other.” – Burton Hillis

94. “I stopped believing in Santa Claus when I was six. Mother took me to see him in a department store, and he asked for my autograph.” – Shirley Temple

95. “It’s Christmas Eve! It’s the one night of the year when we all act a little nicer, we smile a little easier, we cheer a little more. For a couple of hours out of the whole year, we are the people that we always hoped we would be.” – Bill Murray

96. “Mail your packages early so the post office can lose them in time for Christmas.” – Johnny Carson

97. “Christmas is a baby shower that went totally overboard.” – Andy Borowitz

98. “I haven’t taken my Christmas lights down. They look so nice on the pumpkin.” – Winston Spear

99. “There are three stages of man: he believes in Santa Claus; he does not believe in Santa Claus; he is Santa Claus.” – Bob Phillips

100. ”Christmas to a child is the first terrible proof that to travel hopefully is better than to arrive.” – Stephen Fry

Read also: 100 Walt Disney Quotes That Inspire Life And Experiences

Those are the 100 funniest quotes about Christmas that became our passion about Christmas and also Merry Christmas to all of you on a day full of peace and love for others.

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